new year's resolutions (for you)

Congrats. You survived the trauma of another year. But before I dive into 2018 with my bulletproof vest for when stuff goes down, I need all of you guys to take a look in the mirror and contemplate your life existence. Is this post a little bit late? Yes. My new year's resolution is to be late for everything, lower people's standards, and wow everyone when I make it to graduation on time.

1) Stop posting your "motivational" fitness posts.

First of all, chances are the only reason I followed you is because I wanted you to follow me back so I don't look like a loser on instagram (don't you tell me you haven't been there). So no, I don't want my feed to be spammed with people who are benching 300 while I'm eating pizza. I did not log into social media to be shamed about my eating habits, I came because I want to see pictures of puppies.

Second of all, can we talk about when people repost other people's fit posts and say "motivation"? Like, listen Brenda, I'm 5'3, and unless I lose a rib or two, I'm not going to look like Karlie Kloss.

2)Can we stop posting selfies and putting inspirational quotes under them? You guys, when I see a bomb pic of somebody, I don't think, "you know what this reminds me of? Ghandi!" Your selfie is not going to make nonviolence go viral, okay? Use the Kendall Jenner Pepsi commercial as a reference.

In 2018, if you're posting a picture of yourself because you look dang good, own that ish! You tell people that you don't care what they think, you're a beauty and you know it.

3) For anyone who is rooming with someone, please, please don't let your room smell like your own vomit. This goes triple for college students--chances are, we didn't choose you! Nobody wants to have to explain that they want to sleep on someone's else's floor because their dorm has become a slip and slide. Come on Dave, you're a biomed major. Figure biology out.

4) For goodness sakes, you guys can watch an entire season of Doctor Who in one night but you can't make it to a polling booth? What are you going to do when the Doctor stops coming to earth because you guys let Kanye West become President?

5) So, I'm not saying you guys have to stop posting artsy pics. I'm just saying if you guys are going to keep doing this you have to teach me how so my wall can stop looking like a failed middle school project.

But you guys, on a serious note, there are a lot of things wrong in the world, some things that need to end. And you guys should know that I am and always will be a mental illness advocate. So lets break the stigma on mental illness this year.

That's my new year's resolution

Keep taking care of yourselves, dreamers

#nami #newyearsresolutions